Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Intro, of sorts

Ah, I've missed these days. So much inspiration for writing. It's been too long.

But seeing as this is in many ways a 'new' blog and given the number of people reading who weren't privy to the Open Diary and Bloop days of blogging, perhaps it's time to say more about myself than I bothered to put in a profile.

My name is Marisa Feathers. I'm 40 years old. Married to Charlie for 23 years. Together we have 5 kids. Krys (21 and married to Steve), Rebecca (Becka is 18 and 17 week pregnant with our first grandchild), Rachel (17), Daniel (15) and John (12 and in the process of being officially diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome)

In october 2007 we legally adopted an adult daughter. She is no longer part of our lives. It's a touchy subject and one I will rarely address here.

I am a Christian, active in my church and a leader in the areas of worship and youth. I recently began my first semester of a bible school called Global Missions Training Institute. For the first time in many, many years I am comfortable enough to write about my faith and look forward to more of it.

My blogging runs the gamut from the serious to the utterly goofy. One skill rampant in our family is the ability to find the absurd in situations that would make most others cry. There is no overall theme to this blog. It's random, opinionated, weird and a reflection of me. It is what it is. The ramblings of a strange creature who hopes someone, somewhere can relate to and be touched by what they read.

You know, trying to sum up anything about myself in a single post seems like a joke...

All prior blogs are currently locked away on a hard drive that went poof. It hasn't been much of a priority to recover those writings but might be worth having Charlie do his computer magic thingie.

Man... this was not supposed to turn into some existential drama...

The name of the blog... Bittersweet Gestalt. This comes from the journey of the last couple of years... the times since I closed my last real blog and stopped writing for a season.

I'm a recovered multiple... as in Dissociative Identity Disorder, formerly known as Multiple Personality Disorder.

For most of the first 37 or so years of my life, I lived a fractured existence. Much of my childhood is a mish-mash of random memories and years long holes. In and out of hospitals as a teen and the early years of marriage... then for a number of years a perfect example of productive wife and mother until my defenses and delusions broke down. In 1999 I was finally diagnosed and entered therapy with both a trauma therapist and a psychiatrist specializing in DID. Most of that journey was recorded in a blog called The Crew.

Integration, such as it is, has been a whole new journey all its own. One I've avoided writing about. In part because of blogger burnout, a collection of hurts it was convenient to blame and my own laziness.

My life seems to be entering yet another new season. Children are reaching adulthood, starting life on their own, and I'm about to become a grandmother. Seems a good time to open the doors to writing again... about life, family, faith and this roller-coaster of learning to be me.

Here's hoping it's still something worth sharing.